I have heard it said that the way others recognize I am an addict is by my behavior.
In the 4th Step, we learn what "moral" means to us individually. Though we suffer from a disease and not a moral dilemma, the actions we focus on in Step 4 come from a moral inventory; so we get well acquainted with the term "moral."
In the 5th Step, we go behind the moral inventory to examine the exact nature of our wrongs that drive the specific inventory.
Now we have been clean for a while and we haven't done any dope for a very long time. So if we are so dedicated to a life of recovery beyond the use of dope, where is our behavior now?
Step One "Denial, substitution, rationalization, justification, distrust of others, guilt, embarrassment, dereliction, degradation, isolation, and loss of control are all results of our disease."
What behaviors do I currently indulge in that is clearly contrary to a spiritual life by using those shields as defined in Step One above; behaviors that would clearly earn space on a 4th step moral inventory?
Why am I reserving these behaviors? for self-will? Is it ego? Is it fear?
What does inner unmanageability really mean and am I willing to compartmentalize it to indulge in my own shortcomings?
Or do I want something more, and if so, how do I get there?